Trust

So there we were, at least 10 minutes past bedtime (typical) just having finished supervised teeth brushing and a quick bang trim before her "spa" birthday party tomorrow with her little friends and she wanted to play a game.

Like I said, typical.

It's not that Katie doesn't behave well, she does. Just on her own terms. It's been that way since the very beginning. Heck, even before the very beginning she was making her voice loud and clear by creating quite a stir in our little family before even being born.

I like to say that it's the girl in her, but I'm probably wrong. I think it's just her.

So she wanted to play the game where one person closes their eyes and falls backwards, letting the other person (who is hopefully standing and ready behind them) catch them. Trust. She wanted to fall into her Dad's arms so bad and attempted it many, many times before we offered to show her how it's done. I don't know if she was just being chicken, because that is so unlike her, or if she was just in a mood, but once she saw that Dad didn't drop Mom she was ready to try again.

I will give her this, she is, if anything, persistent.

Finally, arms crossed in a V over her chest, she lets go. She slips backwards into the arms of her father and giggles ferociously. So proud of herself.

"I won't let go of you," he says to her.

And as I'm sandwiched in the hallway, unable to get by as I observe this little stall of the bedtime routine, I can't help but think wasn't it just yesterday that we held her everywhere we went, every moment of the day, every waking hour? Trust. Infants don't understand trust, they just are. Trust isn't a game played with your Dad before bedtime, it is just the way it is.

I won't let go of you.

And my, what a long time ago that was.

In a few days she'll be 7. That seems like such a big number for such a little girl. 7. Closer now to being double digits than to being the infant she once was.

I've spent far too many hours keeping her my baby. Far too many. But I can't help myself. It's just the way it is.

I just hope she always trusts us.


Happy Birthday Baby Girl.