I know, it's been a while since I sat down to write you a letter, a memo, heck - even a note. All I can say about that is this: your summertime activities and shenanigans have been keeping me busy, busy, busy. I'm sure you understand.
Speaking of summer, I do believe it has been a record-breaking summer around here (and I'm not talking about the heat)! In that, it has taken me until now, August 13 to be exact, to complain about you folk. That's right! Almost 2 whole months. Aren't you proud of me? 2 months is a looooong time, especially in "kid time," which takes even longer than normal "adult time." Trust me on this one.
It's not that I don't love you all dearly, and yearn to spend every waking moment (ok, that might be stretching it a bit) of my time with you (I mean, I do need my privacy for things like going to the bathroom and begging your Dad to hang my flower baskets), but we've got to strike some sort of balance here if we are all to make it until September 8th, when school finally starts. Frankly (no, you don't have an Uncle Frank that you don't know about, it is simply an expression), I'm not sure how we will survive.
Boys, I understand and accept your need to be rambunctious. BUT - you do not need to be rambunctious in the house. You are setting a bad example for the dog, who I am trying to keep civilized. Also, could you please stop speaking in "Transformer" language? And it would be helpful if you kept your peanut butter consumption down to 1/2 cup a day. Costco had to order an extra pallet of the stuff just to keep us stocked for the summer.
Katie, I understand and accept the fact that you are almost 6 years old (OMG, how did that happen?). BUT - you do not rule the universe. If you'd like to learn more about Greek mythology and females that supposedly did rule the universe, I'd be happy to take you to the library and get some books about them. Or, we could look it up online (and no, Webkinz dot com is not the site where we would be finding this information, nice try). Also, could you please stop leaving your swim suit bottoms all over the house. And it would be nice if you would actually embrace the eating of the breakfast - as it will greatly improve your morning attitude.
That's about it for now. I have to go blow up another floatie for the 33nd time this summer so I need to conserve every bit of hot air I have left. There are Popsicle's in the freezer and your Dad will be home soon, so you better make sure your rooms are clean.
Oh, and kids? You're on your own for dinner tonight, which means (please don't roll your eyes at me like that) spaghetti, again.
PS - Jumping in the lake and taking a bath are not the same thing.