Wednesday, July 09, 2008

A Reality Check

When the phone rang at 9:15 am, I had no idea who it could be – I mean who calls this early in the morning anyway? I thought to myself as I rolled over and grabbed the antiquated corded phone off its cradle on my husband’s bedside table.

“Hi, may I please speak to Carrie?” said a way too perky for 9:15am female voice.

“This is she.” I answered, trying my best to sound pert and awake. It doesn’t matter if I am talking to a total stranger or someone I know well, I always try to sound like I am awake when I am really not while receiving calls.

“Hi! This is We Kick Your Butt Gym! (Name changed to protect the innocent) Your payment information is expired and I need to either renew the current credit card you have on file, or update it with a new one. Would you like to take care of that right now?”

For a moment I ponder when exactly the last time I set foot in that gym was, and upon realizing that it was three months ago . . . for my friend’s daughter’s birthday party (Oh yes, I remember, there was cake!) I kindly ask the perky number on the end of the line to cancel my membership.

Of course this can’t be done over the phone. “Actually, you will need to come in and sign the cancellation agreement and pay the $30 you owe for this month before you can cancel, are you sure this is what you would like to do?” She is not sounding so perky now, maybe she had a dip in her blood sugar, maybe she needs a cookie . . .

“Yes, I’ll be in later.” I sputter before hanging up the phone and pulling the covers over my head one last time.

15 comments:

Valarie said...

I am planning on joining a new gym we have, and I am sure this will probably happen to me. :)

Manic Mom said...

Don't you hate how they try to sucker you to come in "one" last time?

LindaJ said...

I tried to find the episode of Friends where Chandler tries to quit the gym...youtube has deleted it, but you need to watch it. Season 4

Michelle Smiles said...

What are they going to do if you don't go in? They'll send you the bill and you can send them $30. I hate that "suck them in one last time" thing that gyms do.

Jen said...

I always try to sound "awake" when the phone rings after nine and I'm still sort of asleep. If it's before nine then I try to sound as asleep and annoyed as possible because anyone that calls before nine is an obnoxious fool.

Elizabeth said...

hahaha...very funny! i do the same thing w/ trying to sound awake...but i have such a low register voice it never works...my normal voice is almost like morning voice. HA!

Nora Bee said...

I think she definitely needed a cookie.

zellmer said...

You give me hope that one day my kids will sleep later than 6am, and that I too will consider 9am early in the morning. I can't even imagine sleeping that late. It sounds like heaven.

Mamasphere said...

When this happened to me, it'd been a good six months since I'd set foot inside the gym that was really a pick up place for young, already fit 20 somethings. There was NO WAY I was going back to sit my fat arse in a too small chair to sign a paper. So I told them I had moved to another country, and they let me cancel online.

Domestic Spaz said...

Did you go in? I want to hear if they gave you a sales pitch again!

Queen of the Mayhem said...

Don't even get me started on the gym....my waistline is expanding like NOBODY's business!

I need an intervention!

MyUtopia said...

Ugg...that is wrong.

Kimmylyn said...

Evil troll. **My gym is the same way.. make you go all the way down there to do something they totally can do over the phone..

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

They can TOTALLY do this over the phone. Just call them when you are AWAKE!

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

Better yet.. Find out what your balance is. Send them the money and a letter saying simply "Please Cancel My Membership."

Done!