Friday, April 18, 2008

A Day at Home with a Husband

I sneeze, loudly, and say, "Oh god, excuse me."

My husband says, "I don't think god makes excuses."

The weather is being nasty. Husband looks out the window as the rain is rolling down from the sky and says, "It's snowing."

"No it isn't," I tell him.

We then bicker back and forth about the non-accumulation of anything fluffy and white in the grass.

We're painting our new "office." The final step in our latest home-remodeling project which has given us a much-needed fourth bedroom and an (can I get a heck yeah?) office. I ask husband if he'd like to take the old trim off before I begin painting (it's being replaced) or if I should just cut in as close as possible like I did in the other room?

Instead of telling me what he'd like me to do, he decides it's his job to dress me.

"Well, the first thing I'd do is change your pants."

"Um, that's not what I asked you, dear."

"You don't want to get those pants dirty," he continues.

I take a deep breath, explain that these cruddy old green terry cloth lounge pants are, if anything, suitable for grubby work.

Ever take your husband grocery shopping?

Good times right there. I love walking down the aisles trying to adhere to my list while my husbands makes wise cracks behind me or questions why I am buying those carrots instead of these ones.

Thankfully, I got the shopping done earlier in the week.

"So, what are we doing here? What's the deal?" he says from behind me as I type.

"I thought you were going to the hardware store to get a drop cloth," I answer as I glance out the window and see the large (okay, WHITE) precipitation falling from the sky.

"But it's not snowing," he says sarcastically before he pokes me in the side.

I really don't know how we are going to survive retirement.

Check out that non-snow!


Stacy said...

Loved this! Too funny. I thought your bio sounded familiar -- I recognize you from Seattle Moms. I just joined but don't think I'm on the blogroll yet.

Thanks for stopping by my blog!


Mamacita Tina said...

Crack me up! My dad retired for one entire year before deciding he had to go back to work to save his marriage.

Kellan said...

So funny and it made me think about that same thing - how my hubby and I will manage during retirement!

Have a good weekend Carrie - see you soon - Kellan

Ann(ie) said...

Okay, first of all. I cannot get my mind around the fact that it is April 18th and it is SNOWING!! My friend just called from Everett and told me. My.god. I have several pair of flip flops just beggin me to wear them and this is just getting annoying!

And you guys sounds just like Matt and I. I keep telling him I'm going to be a snow bird when I retire (6 mo here....6 mo in Arizona) he says he'll miss me. You should really consider joining me. ;)

Happy Weekend Girlie!

The Scott Family said...

Wow that is hilarious, we seem to be married to men with similar ideas as to how things should be done.

Anonymous said...

I hear you.

I am so glad I got sick & had to stay home ALONE today & your Dad is with your boys at YOUR house, while you & Katie are out in the SNOW (Day 2, April l9th!!!) doing the dreaded BuildaBear Birthday (I sense another post coming).

I love having him around.. but....

Just, but.


ps. I have baked bread, reorganized my recipes, read a magazine, done a crossword... and it is only 12:30!!!

LindaJ said...

Oh, Sisita...I feel your pain cuz I'm living that right now. My cruise director is home bossing me around as I sit here typing...

When are you going to clean this? What is this pile over here? Do we need this? What's for dinner? (it's only 10am)

retirement? I'm sorry it will not be an option for him unless he changes his attitude.

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

So funny and real! I have told my hubby he is never allowed to retire either! I'm joking with him though!

Huckdoll said...

Yuck, that photo was a total buzz kill. It reminded me of the SNOW we got here last night. It's been such a long winter now! Too long! Longest winter I can EVER remember.

Cindy said...

As I often remind mine (He works nights) "I married you for better or for worse. Not for lunch."