Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Baseball Rage

Little League baseball in my hometown brings out the best in people.

And the worst.

And I'm not talking about the kids.

There is no other place, other than the local dive bar (which I swear on a stack of my Nanny's bibles I do not frequent...on a regular basis) where a person can witness such juvenile behavior from grown adults. Well, maybe on the set of Jersey Shore, but I've never sat through an entire episode of that so I can't really say.

The grown-ups are terrible! Sure, there are a few stand outs who do not throw hissy fits when their son drops a ball or gets tagged out on base, but they are few and far between, which makes attending these games an overload of the senses and an extreme exercise in self control. That is, an exercise in trying to keep my mouth shut so I don't read one of these full-grown tantrum throwers the riot act in front of a bunch of kids.

There are just some things that should stay in Vegas and most of these guys obviously didn't get that memo.

So I was not entirely surprised when I witnessed a big Jeep with tires the size of small houses pull into a designated and clearly marked handicap parking space a few weeks ago at the ball field. Obviously this person who shall remain nameless but I want to call a name that rhymes with juice flag thinks that they are above the law and can park anywhere they want.

If you've ever parked at one of our local ball fields, especially the newer one which we were at that particular day, you'd know that parking is a sore subject - almost but not quite as sore a subject as the drop-off loop at the elementary school...

I'm sensing a trend here.

So the origin of my displeasure was not coming completely out of left field (pun intended).

Do you ever get the feeling that John Quinones from the show What Would You Do? is watching you? Like when you see a piece of trash on the sidewalk and you have a quick debate in your mind over picking it up vs leaving it there and you decide to go ahead and pick it up because you have enough hand sanitizer in your purse to clean and prep a patient for major surgery and the chances of you contracting any horrible germ from that ONE PIECE OF GARBAGE is far less than the public humiliation you might endure being labeled SOMEONE WHO DOES NOTHING on a major television program. So you pick up the garbage. Wait for the cameras to rush you and say you did the right thing. And get on with your day when nothing happens.

Or is that just me?

I was more than ready to address this parking thief.

I waited until the child was out of the mega Jeep because I have the common sense not to have unintended bad words in front of kids, of course. But as soon as that ball player was half way to the field I was ready. I had my plan in place. I was going to approach the driver with kindness first, before pointing out that by parking there he was taking something from us all, not just the people who actually need those parking spaces. And if he didn't agree with me, I was going to break out the kid issue.

Think about what you're teaching your children, you heartless troll. I would beg of him.

The time had come.

The drivers door was opening.

And out he stepped...

With a cane.

Who's the juice flag now?


jetcity said...

So not where I thought that was heading! Ooops. As for the What Would YOU Do, I feel that way all the time! Just waiting for those cameras the one time I do nothing.....

Anonymous said...

Happens all the time.

A couple of weeks ago I saw three guys get out of a car in a HCP space where I work. No one had a cane or other obvious impairment. Two were smoking. I figure the HC was mental.