Thursday, June 17, 2010

So Maybe It's Not the Rain

"When I'm stuck with the day that's gray and lonely, I just stick out my chin and grin and say..."

You know how the rest goes.

Today I woke up to more rain!

I promised myself that I wouldn't complain about it but there seems to be a pain shooting down the front of my right knee. Therefore, complaining about the weather is almost mandatory as obviously I've reached the age where my body is reacting to the weather. Obviously! What other reason is there for this unexplained, sudden pain?

This morning my oldest son wore a sombrero to school. His friends sister (read: driving teenager, should I be worried?) offered to bring the boys to school, their 2nd to last day of 7th grade, with a few conditions. 1 - he had to wear a sombrero. 2 - he had to run around her car 3 times before being permitted to enter.

3 - I am officially old. Hence, the achy knee.

How is it that I have a child old enough to engage in these kind of silly teen-aged antics? How?

The 5th grader is graduating (GRADUATING) from elementary school this morning. Next year he'll be in middle school.

I don't even know why I bothered with mascara today.

Last night the little one, the one who I was just last week lamenting about her growing up, was in a school play. Technically, it was a kindergarten play, but it was at school, so. I was prepared to barely hear her, given her past performances in front of large groups of people. But she rocked it. She bellied up to the microphone even, at the end of the Goldilocks and the Three Bears performance, and thanked the audience for coming to her class play.

I died.

I know I spend way too much time lamenting about the fact that I cannot, despite all my efforts, freeze time. But how can I not? When I wander into each of their rooms at night and kiss their little, medium-sized, and large foreheads I sill am in awe that they are my children. How can I not be fascinated by every move they make?

Every step you take, I'll be watching you...


Time will pass, children will become adults and I'll grow more wrinkles than a California raisin - these things are inevitable. But I don't think I'll ever grow weary of being impressed with my kids. I'll cry through each rite of passage, each graduation and each school play - and there is no shame in that. No shame at all.

Only love.

Now excuse me, I have a graduation ceremony to get to.


Kendra said...

Oh, what a heart-wrenching day! It's so beautiful to see them grown up (and that bit with the sombrero cracks me up), but it's hard at the same time. Honestly, one of the things that keeps me going is seeing that my relationship with my parents has improved tremendously in the last 10 years or so--and especially since I've had kids. Now we're more peers, more friends, more both intelligent people instead of parent and child. And though it breaks my heart to see them get bigger (and my oldest is only 6), I remind myself sometimes that someday, we'll be adults together, and that is going to be amazing.

Anonymous said...


Just came across this blog(FDNY wife, looking for info on med.issues for DH)and you are an absolute delight! I am going to keep reading you, Carrie.


carrie said...

Thanks Tricia! Glad you found me. :)