Friday, February 19, 2010

Millionaire Redhead Crusher

It's no secret: I love me some reality TV.

The Bachelor, Survivor, The Real Housewives, etc. have replaced slots in my television viewing repertoire that previously were held by good sitcoms like Friends and Beverly Hills 90210...the old version, which has been gone for a long, long time. I wish there were enough hours in the day to watch a disgusting amount of these shows and tackle all there is to be done, but alas, there is not.

So when I do find a little chunk of not yet spoken for by someone else me time, I want it to be good. I mean really good. Like, bathtub, bottle of wine and a really good book good.

I don't want it to be sprinkled with "mama's" and requests from the living room to come and play Guitar Hero.

I don't want it to be gazed upon by eyes that wish I were playing Barbie or painting ten colors of glitter on someone's finger nails (although there is a time and a place for all of those activities).

Oh no, I want my me time to be mind numbing, thoughtless, gluttonous, selfish and all mine.

So when I sat down to watch this week's episode of The Millionaire Matchmaker (click to see the video of her rant against redheads) on Bravo onDemand, I was floored.

Normally, I find solace and entertainment in watching the romantic follies of others unfold on the tv screen (read: I have put up with The Bachelor for each and every season it has existed) and usually, Patti Stanger is as much of a riot as are her outlandish "millionaires." But this week, I got more than I bargained for.

Call me sensitive, I don't care.

But her blanket statement of all redheads ("Every redhead is a pain in the ass...") made flames shoot from my eyeballs, and just about everywhere else you can imagine, according to Patti - apparently the world's foremost expert on redheads.

I've got news for you Ms. Stanger, you messed with the wrong bull. Or bulless, if you please.

Sure, that gal on your show was as crazy as they come, but she doesn't even come close to representing redheads as a SPECIES. About the only thing I have in common with that broad is that when you make me angry, you really make me angry (hence, this post). And when you offend my awesome, redheaded girlfriend tribe, you have gone too far.

Ours is a dwindling population and I failed to add an heir to the redhead population with my 3 children of blond, blond and brunette hair, but you will not stamp me out Patti.

The funny thing about being a redhead is that for my entire life, despite my own insecurities about my hair color, I've been given compliments on my hair color - even to the point of arguing with a woman as to which number of color I had used (sorry, 2 grandmas and mother nature honey). I've been called names, I've been teased, and I've been embarrassed by middle school bullies for the color of my hair. For the most part, I've gotten past it...now that I'm almost 37. But dammit, it takes only a few comments out of your mouth to tear holes in all those covered up wounds again and for that I don't think I can forgive you. Maybe you can bully your so-called clients and your employees, but you can't bully me.

And if that makes me a pain in the ass...than so be it.

Now excuse me, I have some Guitar Hero to go play.

Oh, and this one's for you:


Rock on, fellow redheads. Rock on.

19 comments:

Melissa said...

By the way. You rock that red hair. I'm jealous. And so is this Patti lady (jealous I mean), who by the way, needs a read job!

Anonymous said...

Carrie--I am proud to be one of the seven women redheads in our family (even though my color has both darkened and grayed). I endured the teasing also, but I think people were just jealous. Thanks for defending us.

Love from your Aunt Joan

Jaimie Mohan said...

Thank you Carrie!I knew you would have something to say about that!

:) Jaimie - Your Redheaded friend (with two redhead boys)

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

I married a ginger and gave birth to one. I think ya'll are great!

Anonymous said...

I don't know, but I think there is some red in that little girls head. She may represent yet as she gets older!

Kendra said...

I've always been jealous of redheads, and I can admit that. My hair has ranged from light blonde to dark brown (both naturally and with the help of Clairol or whatever was on sale). But I've never had even the littlest hint of red in it. It's not common, and it's really lovely. Way to do the sisterhood of redheads proud!

Christie said...

Thank you!!! Until I watched that episode I actually liked Patti Stanger but no longer will I watch her show. I was so angry after that episode! My hair is as red as they come and has been since the day I was born. Had she made that comment about someone based on their race or religion, she would have gotten hell about it but her comment about redheads will go largely unnoticed. She also states that men don't like redheads. Honey, I have never had any problems in the men department. I want to know how many times a stranger has stopped her to tell her how gorgeous her hair is or had someone ask to touch it. I am so over this B....

Rachel said...

This woman is ridiculous. I borrowed her book from the library before this episode showed - basically, in her opinion (and let me stress THAT part), redheads should just give up on dating. Men, specifically millionaires, don't want them. If you are tall, you are intimidating. Curly hair is awful. Freckles are bad.

To sum it up: being a 5'10" curly-haired redhead with pale skin and LOTS of freckles, I should give up on dating. I may be smart, athletic, witty, and kind, but because of my ginger hair, Patti Stinker states that men do not, and will never, want me.

She doesn't like redheads because they don't put up with the truckloads of B.S. that come pouring out of this witch's botoxed craw.

Jennette said...

August thought you were going to say Donald trump, not Patti! Hilarious! i live with two red heads and I love red heads. Red rocks!

Liz said...

What you said about being loved and teased all at the same time for being a ginger hit home. And, YES as adults we become comfortable with our hair, but those teasing wounds are easily opened for sure. I love Patti's show but WOW what a horrible blanket statement. As a single 20 something I would HOPE that men like redheads otherwise my dating life has been one big imaginative story haha. ;)

Anonymous said...

Amen sister. What do you call someone who is prejudiced against redheads other than a thunderbitch? I have dated millionaires with no problem!

Anonymous said...

Amen! Most of those girls end up looking like prostitutes anyway. Who is she to judge? As a redhead I happen to be married to a millionaire!

Anonymous said...

Red heads ARE a pain in the ass !! Noone says "I wanna be a red head when I grow up" or "I hope my kid is red headed" psh...you are all dillusional on what people think about red heads...she must be doing something right she has a show, she has money and people go to her...none of which all of you can say...good luck !PS the pic you put up makes your hair look way more brown then it does red!

Unknown said...

Hi there! I am fed up with PS and her awful comments about redheads. My mother always told me that one day I'd love my hair and she was right! Furthermore, it appears that there are ample men who LOVE our fiery locks as well as plenty of women who try to copy them. I love my uniqueness & am glad that I don't blend in to the crowd like poor Patti. One more thing - I've found (and married) a wonderful man who is rich beyond the material definition that PS embraces.

Anonymous said...

Thanks gf, I finally at 48 love my red hair. I was offended and hurt by Patti's remarks.

Katie said...

I saw that episode too and on my own blog I made myself over to fit her specifications. 1st I was a blonde with straight hair and heavy eyeliner and a tan and then a brunette ala PS with the red lipstick etc. I also find it kind of off-putting that she suggests that to get a man women cannot have curly hair and must put their breasts on display and wear super high heels. Just to show that redheads are beautiful, I made her photo over so she is a fair-skinned redhead with natural makeup (except for her eyeshadow which I could not fix.)
I think looks pretty and softer as a redhead.
http://katievenusinretrograde.blogspot.com/2011/03/makeovers.html

Here's the link to the photos of my makeovers ala Patti and :
http://katievenusinretrograde.blogspot.com/2011/05/millionaire-matchmaker-makeover-for.html

(those are of me as a brunette or blond.)

Anonymous said...

You are gorgeous and my 6 year old graddaughter is also a gorgeous redhead. I cannot believe the nerve of Patti to make that idiotic blanket statement!

Red on the head ... said...

I have auburn hair and would never need at match maker. That is why she had to get blondes and brunettes to dye their hair red for the men who wanted redheads (pretty sure the only show with two men in love) because every man knows red on the head fire in the hole!!! Seriously, how many redheads do you know that need any help with men? Zero. I'm sure she had a man leave her for a redhead, and yes we are picky....we can afford to be. We are rare and beautiful and Patti is just another plain haired hater.

Red on the headv said...

Also, to the person who posted noone says "I wanna be a redhead when i grow up"....really. I'm pretty sure you are taught in third grade or so that noone is no one (two words). That is just one of your grammatical errors, sorry I'm a redhead....that means I am smarter than you. Bless your heart!