I thought I was over this. I thought with my obsessive and downright refusal to participate in any more Goody Bag hoo-ha that I would end the vicious cycle of having to compete with other parents in a group setting.
I was wrong, again.
Baseball season is upon us and this year we have a highly organized pair of parents in charge of the kids and all of us unruly, screaming parents who sit on the sidelines and pretend that they are the coaches. When I say that they are organized, I mean it.
I will not have to worry about planning a team party 2 days before the end of the season and trying to beg the other parents for the money for a coaches gift at the last minute. Oh no! Not I! This season I actually get to enjoy the game and hopefully gossip with my friends from our oh so comfortable chairs as the Dads umpire and prove their manliness while assisting the boys as their base coaches.
Our organized coach and his wife have assured us that we will have little to worry about, that is, except for snacks.
I know that snack has five letters, but it should have four.
When I was given the paperwork for the season on the first day of practice, the snack schedule was, of course, attached.
Because our last name starts with the letter B, I am usually expecting to be on the top of the list. Lo and behold, there we were, the parents required to provide the snack on game #2! Thankfully, there was an A person in front of us, so the pressure of bringing the very first snack of the season would be taken off my shoulders.
You all know how important little league snacks are, right?
So there we were, the first game was close to ending and I glanced over at the bench where the snack mom was setting up.
Since it was freezing cold and my other 2 monkeys were living it up in the car, watching the last inning from the other side of the windshield, I offered to help her hand out the snack.
"Sure," she says, "can you pass out the milk?"
"Milk . . . hmmmm . . . " I think, "that's going to go over really well with the kids." Little do I know that it is that super chocolaty, thick, organic kind that you get at Costco.
Then she whips out the mondo-sized bag of individual chips that I quit buying for the boys' lunches because I thought they should have something healthier than chips (like those 100-calorie packs).
Then (oh yes, there is more) she brings out three boxes of cupcakes, and I'm not talking about those small homemade kind like I gave to the kids that showed up for our last birthday party; I'm talking fancy, store-bought, sprinkled cupcakes. Enough for all the boys on the team, the siblings AND the parents. It's a cupcake-a-palooza!
And I am snack mom next.
I'm thinking hummus and carrot sticks.
And to drink?